Joy In Autism

January 1.  A whole new year is stretched out before us.  I started the day at 5:00 am by taking my momma to the airport after a great two-week visit.  I returned from the snowy drive home to be greeted at the door by my Cooper.  He was smiling big and wanted me to set him up with a pillow, blanket, milk and a movie.  So here we sit while the rest of the house sleeps.  And as I was logging onto my laptop Cooper glanced over and winked at me.  He got up and came over and said, “Give me a hug, Mom.”  You know, no matter how the night before ended, the kids always seem to wake up with a fresh new happiness.  Glad to see me, glad to be awake and excited about the day.

As I sit here thinking about all of the New Year’s Resolutiony type things I want to do in 2009…you know, “eat better, exercise more, be less grumpy, read my bible more, paint the house, save the dolphins”… as I sit here thinking about them knowing that some of them I will do better at than others, one thing I know is that I will take advantage of as many opportunities as possible to let my kids know I love them and enjoy being in their presence.   That I too am glad to see them and glad we have another day together.

Last night Cooper wanted to make a snowman.  It was dark outside and the last thing I felt like doing was going out in the cold and dark.  But he was so very excited and had it all planned out, a carrot, a happy face, two eyes, arms and 20 buttons.  At first I said, “No. I don’t feel like going outside.”  Then I saw the look in his eyes.  The disappointment.  His shoulders drooped a bit and he said, “Okay, Mom.”  There was no good reason for me not to suit up and go out, so I went to get my snowpants.  He didn’t care that it looked more like Jabba-the-Hut than a snowman, he was thrilled we did it.  That’s the kind of stuff I need to be more aware of.  The opportunities I need to take. Often I don’t do something because my agenda doesn’t include painting or play dough.  I probably miss out on a lot of smiles because of that.  My agenda in 2009 and beyond will not be so packed that a romp in the snow would throw off the schedule.

It’s easy to be feeling all warm and fuzzy as I sit on the couch and Coop is happily watching Curious George and the others are peacefully sleeping.  I know things will get hairy and tempers go out of control and frustration sometimes will set in.  But for now, I am counting my blessings and thanking God for the gift of every person He’s given me to share my days with.  And I will make sure they know it.

Peace.